04/21/2015

Simply Surviving

Today I am officially 20 weeks pregnant, and although I am only halfway through, it is amazing how far I have come. I first wrote this post around the end of January when I was about 9 weeks along. These emotions are definitely in-the-moment and real, but I am so glad I wrote them down and was honest about how I was feeling. Now looking back and remembering that time, I realize just how hard those first weeks were for me. When your whole world is changing it can be so scary, especially when you have ‘control freak’ tendencies. Pregnancy has really forced me outside my comfort zone into a place where ‘simply surviving and not thriving’ is sometimes the only option. It has taught me that I can push through even some of the hardest days while coming out even better and stronger on the other side. It has also shown to me how easy it is to put your baby first even from the get-go. It’s amazing how such a tiny being can make you both so nauseated and exhausted, but also how he or she can become your entire world in just a matter of moments. Like I say in the passage below, being pregnant is one of the most unselfish things you could ever do, and to all you mamas out there: YOU are amazing!!

I remember back before I was pregnant, I would make bold proclamations (mostly just to my husband) such as:

  • I am only going to eat healthy when pregnant

Oatmeal Breakfast with Strawberries

  • The weight I put on will only be ‘good’ weight, and not just pounds for no reason
  • I am not going to let a little morning sickness keep me down
  • I am still going to exercise everyday

Exercise/Fitness

  • There is no way food aversions will keep me from enjoying my favorite healthy foods

Dewey's Pizza SaladOh the thoughts that enter your head pre-pregnancy. Week 5 was a bit rough and filled with pure exhaustion, and this was before I even knew I was pregnant. The week I did find out I was pregnant though, (week 6) I had so much energy and felt amazing! I was getting my vegetable and fruit servings in, I was running and taking Tebow on walks and being active at the gym, I had no food aversions and was all-in-all really happy with pregnancy so far.

This all changed though into week 7 when the exhaustion from week 5 crept back in, and by week 8 I was dealing with nausea almost 24 hours a day. Saltine crackers became the main food group of my diet. I began eating what sounded good and not necessarily what would give my body the best nutrition. I expressed my concerns to my doctor, and he made a great point that has stayed with me throughout this pregnancy so far. He said the first trimester is all about simply surviving, not thriving, and I was beginning to understand exactly what he meant by that advice.

Cereal and dry toast became my morning and snack staples. Plain bagels sounded absolutely amazing while my usual breakfast of yogurt or peanut butter sounded awful. Coffee, my beloved coffee, made me cringe just thinking about taking a sip. Fruit sounded terrible, and I could only sneak veggies in if there was a lot of salt sprinkled on top or a plenty of ranch for dipping. I even lost my love of chocolate, and drinking water felt terrible on my already sensitive stomach.

When I did find myself hungry though, man-oh-man was I hungry and needed food! Two days into week 8, Chipotle sounded just so amazing and after a day filled with nausea and saltines, suddenly being hungry and wanting food was the best thing ever. Guys, I ate a whole burrito by myself! I have never been able to do that before, and suddenly I couldn’t get the food into my body fast enough.

Exercise went down hill during weeks 7 and 8 as well. I was tired and nauseous, and honestly just wanted to go to sleep every day after work. This was a very hard time for me. All the promises I made pre-pregnancy about being healthy for myself and my baby began to fade. I was simply ‘surviving’ just like my doctor said. He encouraged that usually in the 2nd trimester women took a turn for the better and that is kind of the ‘honeymoon’ period of the pregnancy for most. Although I didn’t want to rush through my pregnancy, I caught myself hoping and wishing to just get to that next phase; that next trimester.

I am sharing these feelings not looking for sympathy, I know how blessed and incredibly thankful I am to be having a baby. I simply want to encourage all of you mamas-to-be out there. You are not alone! Pregnancy is really, really hard, and I don’t think you can necessarily understand it until you are actually pregnant. I know I sure couldn’t relate until right this moment. I always imagined I would be superwoman, but it turns out that I needed to give myself a little grace and self-love. I could only do the best I could and I knew deep down this time wouldn’t last forever. I want to do what is best for my baby, and that also includes just surviving as his or her mom and doing all I can to take care of myself in each moment.

Pregnancy is one of the most unselfish things you can ever do, and this is coming from someone who knows she has her selfish moments! I am growing so much as a person by giving up what’s comfortable, safe and expected to bring my sweet baby into the world. After 26 years of only worrying about myself and doing what I want to do when I want to do it, it is good to be knocked down a bit and realize not everything is in my control, not everything will be perfect, and not everything is always about me! Sometime the best you can do really is, truly, enough.

Simply Surviving Blog Post

Conversation Time.

  • Moms and Moms-To-Be: What about pregnancy was different than you expected? Were there pre-pregnancy ideas you had to relinquish once you found yourself in the midst of that first trimester?
  • If you aren’t yet a mom, what parts of pregnancy are you most nervous about experiencing?
  • If you have been pregnant, what part of pregnancy was the hardest in your opinion? Did you suffer from morning sickness, etc. during the first trimester as well? When did you start to feel better? (Please, please don’t tell me not until after the baby was born! 🙂 )

Comments

  1. This is so true! I had tons of food aversions from week 3 (yes, super early!!) to week 16ish, and it was frustrating. I’m still having them now at week 22 and haven’t had the urge to eat everything in sight like some people experience — I wasn’t expecting a lack of appetite! But, I know that I need to take care of this baby inside of my body for four more months — not long at all, which is crazy to me — and I’m doing the best that I can. I think that’s all we can do!
    Emily @ Perfection Isn’t Happy recently posted…Our Babymoon: Disney World 2015My Profile

    • HappyWifeHealthyLife says:

      I absolutely agree with you, the best we can do is all we can do! Since we are so close week wise in our pregnancies, it feels great to know that I am not alone in experiencing the ‘weirdness’ that is being pregnant. 🙂 I couldn’t agree more with you on your point that we really are pregnant for such a short time, it is crazy how fast it all goes! Reminding myself there will be such an amazing positive at the end of this road keeps me looking forward to each day ahead as opposed to dwelling on the past.

  2. Girl I am right there with you. I just like, can’t agree more. I have never felt so out of control of my own body as I have the past 14 weeks!
    Sarah @ Sweet Miles recently posted…Pregnancy: Weeks 11 & 12My Profile

    • HappyWifeHealthyLife says:

      I love you sweet friend! I know you can relate to a lot of this and I am thankful that we are able to experience pregnancy together and support/encourage each other. I think it would be pretty darn hard to go at this alone and I am so thankful to have friends who are right there with me, making me feel not so crazy! 🙂

  3. I love such an honest post. For me, I really didn’t think I would struggle with body image. I thought all those negative thoughts would go away and I’d just be happy to have growing baby inside me. It’s definitely been hard, but I take it a day at a time and the last few weeks I’ve found myself really loving my new curves and bump.

    • HappyWifeHealthyLife says:

      Dealing with body image and a changing body in pregnancy can definitely be a struggle. You are not alone! I have my moments when I want to cry just because I miss my old body and my old clothes. Thankfully that is when my mom or my husband steps in to remind me that I am beautiful and that I am growing a baby, and that this time will be short so I should try and enjoy it while looking for the good in the whole experience. 🙂

  4. Yes, so many true statements here! I appreciate your honesty because it’s true…you really don’t know what it’ll be like until you actually go through it, and it’s so different for every woman. Pregnancy has really taught me how incredibly smart our bodies are and that I just need to trust it.
    Ashley @ My Food N Fitness Diaries recently posted…Tabata-Style Circuit WorkoutMy Profile

    • HappyWifeHealthyLife says:

      It really is so crazy what a whirlwind pregnancy can be, and like you said, how each pregnancy can differ. I think it’s so important to remember that just because one woman is coasting through pregnancy without a single sick day, while another can barely get out of bed because she is nauseous for 9 months – we need to support and encourage each other no matter what, without judgment or thoughts that one woman is ‘stronger’ than another. Like you have said in your blog posts, your two pregnancies have had distinct differences and you are the same woman! I 100% agree with you, our bodies really are so incredibly smart and know exactly what to do and we need to just trust that! 🙂 I am slowly learning! I am sure approaching this pregnancy as your second time around, you have grown even more trusting with your body. I am hoping that will be the same for me some day too!

  5. I love how eloquently you’ve addressed all the various aspects of your pregnancy and the road to it. Although I’m not pregnant (but can’t wait to be!), I love your openness and honesty about your pregnancy. “Surviving not thriving” is something I think we could all learn for those rough periods in life.

    Thank you for sharing!
    Sarah @ Sarah Sincerely recently posted…Mom Always SaidMy Profile

  6. Ah coffee! I used to LOVE it and now I would much rather have tea! I am also loving cereal, bagels, and other “boring” foods!! Crazy how fast the time goes!
    Kim recently posted…What I am loving at 25 weeks!!My Profile

  7. Love this post, I had a pretty easy time in my first trimester which I think made it hard to ‘connect’ with the pregnancy, I felt great and didn’t FEEL pregnant (somehow I felt like if I had morning sickness I would be constantly reminded of the little baby growing inside of me) Now 27 weeks, feeling the baby kick and knowing things are going well despite a few small mishaps I still have days where I panic, like, the scale said WHAT….and then off I go to the freezer for ice cream…lol It is SO hard being pregnant and I’m so happy to have other people go through it too and understand that just surviving a day without a nap is a feat! lol..YOU go girl!

Speak Your Mind

*

CommentLuv badge